Trauma vs Grief

Trauma

The result of extreme stresses that shatter the sense of security, 

Feeling helpless 

Upsetting emotions, memories, anxiety

Numb, disconnected, unable to trust

Your subjective emotional experience of the event. Not objective 

Grief

The natural response to loss. Emotional suffering.

Grieving is a process. There is no normal timetable for grieving. Be patient.

Many ups and downs. A roller coaster.

Loss affects each person differently.

Trauma Causes

 One time, accident, injury, violent attack. Unexpected or childhood

Ongoing relentless stress, Life-threatening illness, bullying, domestic violence, childhood neglect

Surgery (especially in 1st 3 years of life),

Sudden death of someone close,

Breakup of relationship,

Humiliating or deeply disappointing experience, especially If there was deliberate cruelty

Grief Causes

Divorce or relationship breakup

Loss of health

Losing a job

Loss of financial stability

A miscarriage

Retirement

Death of a pet

Loss of a cherished dream

A loved one’s serious illness

Loss of a friendship

Loss of safety after a trauma

Selling the family home

 
 Emotional & psychological symptoms of Trauma

Shock, denial, or disbelief

Confusion, difficulty concentrating

Anger, irritability, mood swings

Anxiety and fear

Guilt, shame, self-blame

Withdrawing from others

Feeling sad or hopeless

Feeling disconnected or numb

 
Emotional symptoms of grief

Shock and disbelief. 

Sadness. 

Guilt. 

Fear. 

Anger. 
 

Physical symptoms of Trauma

 Insomnia or nightmares

Fatigue

Being startled easily

Difficulty Concentrating

Racing heartbeat

Edginess and agitation

Aches and pains

Muscle tension

 Physical symptoms of grief

Fatigue

Nausea

Lowered immunity

Weight loss or weight gain

Aches and pains

insomnia

Recovery from Trauma

 1. Move, add mindfulness

2. Don’t isolate. You don't have to talk about your trauma. 

3. Self regulate your nervous system, breathing, sensory input, stay grounded.

4. Take care of your health. Sleep, good food, water, sunshine, avoid alcohol and drugs, reduce stress

 How to deal with Grief

 1. Acknowledge your pain.

2. Accept that grief can trigger many different and unexpected emotions.

3. Understand that your grieving process will be unique to you.

4. Seek out face-to-face support from people who care about you.

5. Support yourself emotionally by taking care of yourself physically.

6. Recognize the difference between grief and depression.

 Seek help for trauma if you’re:

•    Having trouble functioning at home or work

•    Suffering from severe fear, anxiety, or depression

•    Unable to form close, satisfying relationships

•    Experiencing terrifying memories, nightmares, or flashbacks

•    Avoiding more and more anything that reminds you of the trauma

•    Emotionally numb and disconnected from others

•    Using alcohol or drugs to feel better

 
5 stages of grief

 Denial: “This can’t be happening to me.”

Anger: “Why is this happening? Who is to blame?”

Bargaining: “Make this not happen, and in return I will ____.”

Depression: “I’m too sad to do anything.”

Acceptance: “I’m at peace with what happened.”

© Billye Matthews 2023. All rights reserved.